Anxiety And Excitement: Same Coin, Different Sides
What's the difference between getting on a roller coaster at the amusement park and going to a job interview? As we examine this, you may be surprised at what you discover. Be warned, though. You may not appreciate the answer to the question. Some may even be offended with the discussion towards the end of this article.
Your Body And Excitement
Let's take a look at the roller coaster scenario first. Imagine you've been looking forward to this moment for the past week. You don't have to show up for work today, and you're with your best friends. It's the most popular ride in the area and you're ready to take part in the thrill of the wind blowing through your hair (or just in your face if you're bald), traveling fast, and laughing with your friends as you scream and holler with every twist, turn and dip.
If we look closer at what goes on with your body when you're in the state of excitement, we might see that your breathing rate is fast, your heart rate is increased, you're sweating, your muscles are tense, your mouth is dry, and your pupils (the black circle in your eyes) are wide open. In addition, you can't focus on anything else except the anticipation of having fun on the roller coaster.
Your Body And Anxiety
Now, let's turn to the second scenario involving the job interview. Imagine that you are getting ready to meet with your potential new employer. You've rehearsed your strong points and the spiel about your ability to work in a team a million times in your head. If you get this job you'll be on your way to higher pay and better lifestyle. If you don't, you'll be stuck in your current job wondering where you went wrong in life.
Again, if we could look closer at what goes on in your body right before your job interview, we might see that your breathing rate is fast, your heart rate has increased, you're sweating, your muscles are tense, your mouth is dry, and your pupils are dilated (opened up wide). In addition, you can't focus on anything else except the anticipation of being evaluated by a potential employer.
Excitement = Anxiety, Physiologically Speaking
So what is the difference between a roller coaster ride and a job interview? Physiologically, nothing. Your body goes through the same chemical and physical alterations and manifestations whether you're excited or anxious. It's because the sympathetic nervous system is activated during times of stress.
Stress, is not inherently a good or bad thing. Stress just indicates that there is a need for your body to respond chemically or physiologically. Stress is caused by good and bad things. Being thrown in a pool of cold water (a bad thing, especially in the middle of winter) will initiate a stress response from your body, causing you to shiver and divert warm blood to your major organs. Watching a funny movie (usually a good thing if it's not an Adam Sandler flick) will also initiate a stress response from your body; your body releases built up tension in the form of laughter.
If there is no difference between excitement and anxiety at the physiological level, then why is one considered a good experience and the other one bad?
The answer lies in our interpretation of the the situation. It's our perception of the circumstance that dictates whether we're excited or anxious. Because our minds control our body chemistry, our mental image of what's happening to us in any given moment determines the label that we assign to an event.
What does this mean for us and how can we use this to our advantage?
Better Control
If emotions like excitement and anxiety are responses to physiological processes, and physiological processes are controlled by the mind, and you control your mind and thoughts, then doesn't that mean that you control your emotions?
We ultimately have control of how we feel. Neither the people that surround us, nor the environment control our emotions. The only thing that controls our emotions are our own individual minds, and that boils down to personal choice in how we want to feel about a given situation.
Excitement and anxiety are two interpretations of the same physiological events that go on inside of us. You can be just as anxious as you are excited about getting on a roller coaster. Similarly, you can be as excited as you are anxious about going on a job interview. It's all in how you want to look at it. But it's the same at the deepest level.
If we can learn how to consciously control our perception of stress invoking events, then we can can minimize the damage that we do to ourselves and maximize the opportunities towards better control of our lives. We won't have to mistakenly blame others for our positions in life, which only promotes a victim's mentality within us. We can start being proud of our accomplishments and progress, rather than minimizing our skills and talents. We can be more confident in our abilities and less worried about failing.
Better Positioning for Personal Growth
In our quest for personal growth and life satisfaction, we must start taking responsibility for the things we can control. Emotional reactions to life events is a good beginning, and one that can be learned and even mastered with practice.
I admit that it's tough to be continually aware of this, day in and day out. But it gets easier to do the more I recognize that I have the power to make a conscious decision about how I want my life to be.
I can't will a million dollars to magically appear onto my lap or to make my relationships have happy endings like so many predictable romantic comedy movies. But I can make conscious and intentional changes within my self and my thinking that will increase the odds of being where I want to be, and living the life I want to live.-RY
And anger, too, R.Y. Let's not forget arousal and anger. Nice post.
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I believe that we can control our emotions to a point. What about grieving, if you try too hard to change you emotion from sad to happy with out going through the whole process I think it can be damaging. I think your methods works for every day life but not tragedies.
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Linda,
Good point! Sometimes I narrow my topic and post quite a bit to help prevent myself from going off on a tangent, and in the process I leave out aspects that might be helpful to others.
Tiffany,
I always find it interesting to learn how others handle life. What has helped you deal with tragedy?
-RY
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Another great post RY. Articles like these would be great for the new Brain Fitness carnival we are launching Jan 19. Here's the link to submit.
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Caroline,
Thanks for the heads up! Will consider something for you carnival.
-RY
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RY:
I have been trying to help others, I created a web site in memory of my boyfriend that way we can look at pictures and read stories any time we are missing him. I have always been the type of person who loves helping other people so I was trying to focus on his family. By making sure they were okay has helped my grieving process. I am still going through the process though, Josh died two months ago.
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Tiffany,
We are so sorry for your loss. We hope that your selfless acts help you through your grief and healing processes. Our condolences to you and Josh's family.
-RY
and
The MRG
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I request for constant information on this topic please.
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Great article and provides much to think about! I found this website: www.deletestress.com to provide helpful information on how we can try to change our thoughts and live more fulfilling lives!
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Tiffany, I am extremely impressed by your true love for your boyfriend. You love him so much still, that u built such a helping community in his memory, keeping the movtive of helping others in mind.
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